Letters From Layla

I'm popping out of my writing cave to share with you our July book selection for the Good Ancestor Book Club!

But first, how are you? How is your heart and your well-being?

I have been so appreciative of my time in my writing cave as I make steady progress towards completing the Young Readers' Edition of Me and White Supremacy. On a related note, today marks the three year anniversary of the original #MeAndWhiteSupremacy Instagram challenge. It's felt like both the shortest and longest three years of my life, and I am grateful to share that the book is also available in French, German, Dutch, Portuguese, and Spanish. I never could have imagined that three years ago today!

Before I share this month's book selection, I wanted to let you know that my team and I will be taking a much needed break soon. In July we have our wonderful book club discussions, as well as two Good Ancestor Podcast episodes to share with you, and then we will be on break through August and September as we take the time to rest and restore ourselves.

We'll be back again in October with a brand new book club selection and new podcast episodes. However, if you are a member of our Patreon community, we'll continue to check-in and chat through that time. Without further ado, here is our latest book club selection…..

In July we'll be reading (M)otherhood by writer and scientist, Pragya Agarwal.

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It's been a minute since I've been on the blog :) I spent April into May observing Ramadan and celebrating Eid Al Fitr, and enjoying my kids being home for their half term holidays.

Speaking of my kids, I don't often share much about them, but I'm a proud mama bear. My son Mohamed turned 7 years old today! Being a mother is one of the greatest joys of my life, and I'm always nostalgic every year as they get a little older and I (hopefully!) get a little wiser. Watching them navigate growing up through a global pandemic has filled me with both fear and hope in equal measure.

We've just finished up another wonderful month in the Good Ancestor Book Club. Dawnie Walton's debut novel The Final Revival of Opal & Nev was such a joy to read. And getting to be in conversation with her and our book club members a few days ago was one of the highlights of my month. As we turn into June, I'm so excited to share our next book selection with you.

In June we'll be reading If I Tell You The Truth by writer, illustrator, and poet, Jasmin Kaur.

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Welcome to May, and with it, a brand new book selection to share for the Good Ancestor Club.

But firstly, how are you? How is your heart? And how are taking care of your precious self and your loved ones?

We are still observing the holy fasting month of Ramadan, and I will be honest and say that I feel like I pretty much sleep-walked through April!

The combination of fasting, pandemic restrictions, pandemic exhaustion, full-time remote school learning for my kids, work, the news, and just... life... made for a pretty intense month. I continue to learn how to be gentle with myself for getting through each day, and grateful for the many blessings that I do have.

Two of the things I am really grateful for in April were co-hosting a two-part series on Boundaries with my friend and sister Leesa Renee Hall for our Patreon communities. And getting to read and be in conversation with Emma Dabiri and her book Twisted / Don't Touch My Hair. It is such a well-written and well-constructed book that I encourage everyone to check out. A huge thank you to Emma for joining myself, Sarita, and our book club members in live conversation this past Thursday to round off the month.

In May we'll be reading The Final Revival of Opal & Nev by fiction writer and journalist, Dawnie Walton.

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Tomorrow marks the first fasting day of the Islamic holy month of Ramadan.

I want to take a moment to wish my Muslim family around the world a safe, blessed, and spiritually nourishing Ramadan.

It is undoubtedly challenging observing this holy month while again being socially distanced from each other, and concerned for our well-being and the well-being of our loved ones.

May this month give us strength. May it remind us of our connection with God and with each other. And may we be blessed with the spiritual replenishment that this month offers.

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I recently had the pleasure of being in conversation with my dear friend and sister Leesa Renee Hall on her podcast, Inner Field Trip. The episode is called Why Anti-Racism Educators Have Strong Boundaries Around Their Time, Energy, and Abilities, and I really recommend giving it a listen.

I love being in conversation with Leesa, so it’s no surprise that when I re-listened to our episode after it aired I thought, “I wanna do this again. But this time, in community!”.

Boundaries are one of my favourite topics to talk about, and I love to talk about them with friends like Leesa who value them as much as I do. I don’t just value them because of the work that I do, but also because of the life I wish to lead. I strongly believe that part of being a good ancestor is having good boundaries. Which is why I am so excited to share with you today a free event that Leesa and I are co-hosting for both of our Patreon communities.

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We have just spent an incredible first month in the Good Ancestor Book Club where we journeyed together in reading and discussing Robert Jones, Jr.'s debut novel, The Prophets.

It was an amazing month that culminated in a live author event this past Thursday with Robert himself in live conversation. Our book club members had the pleasure and privilege of asking Robert questions about the book, his journey, and his writing process and I cannot tell you how honoured I feel to have taken part in that event. It really was the perfect ending to what has been an incredible first month of book-clubbing together. I am so excited to share our second book selection with you!

In April we will be reading Don't Touch My Hair (also called Twisted in the US), by Irish-Nigerian author, academic, and broadcaster, Emma Dabiri.

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Soon Chung Park.
Hyun Jung Grant.
Sun Cha Kim.
Yong Ae Yue.
Delaina Ashley Yaun.
Paul Andre Michels.
Xiaojie Tan.
Daoyou Feng.

We say your names. We honour you. We grieve your senseless deaths. We celebrate your lives. We demand justice and accountability for your murders. We protest, donate, and speak out in your names, and the names of those in Asian American Pacific Islander communities who have been targeted by hate and violence over the last year and beyond. And for those of us not in those communities, we do the work of educating ourselves on the harm committed against the AAPI communities for centuries.

If you are part of the AAPI community, my heart is with you. I stand with you. I am so sorry for the pain you are in. You and your loved ones deserve better.

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I’m going to start out by being honest and letting you know that today’s letter was hard to write.

Words are often the one place where I feel ease, grace, flow, and glow. Words are home to me. But when they are stuck, when they don’t come easy, it’s because I am still processing whatever it is that I am feeling, and I don’t want to preemptively solidify my feelings by concretely stating them in words.

So for now I will say that I am in limbo.

And this limbo has been brought about by yet another emotional week that we are collectively experiencing. That interview with Oprah, Megan, and Harry, and the aftermath that ensued. The one year anniversary of Breonna Taylor’s murder with still no justice served. The tragic murder of Sarah Everard in the UK, and the triggering conversations around sexual harassment and the fears of walking home at night (as well as the lack of conversations on the experiences of cis- and trans- Black, Indigenous, Women of Colour in this regard). The horrific continuing rise of anti-Asian violence in the US in the wake of COVID-19 (but going back centuries). Oh yes, and we are still in a global pandemic having officially reached the one-year mark of social distancing, quarantining, working from home, fearing for our health, losing loved ones, experiencing job insecurity, and just trying to survive.

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Last week the world celebrated the posthumous achievement of Chadwick Boseman winning a Golden Globe award for Best Actor in his incredible portrayal of the character Levee Green in the 2020 film Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom.

I am not one to follow award shows, however I was so elated when I heard this news. As a huge Chadwick Boseman fan I’m still not really over his passing. Though none of us can choose our time to go, it somehow still feels unfair that he’s already gone. In every role he played, he gave his best, and instilled in so many of us a sense of Black pride, dignity, and grace. He truly was a good ancestor, using the time he had with us here meaningfully. He has left us with a legacy of healing and liberation.

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This weekend I did something I haven’t done in more than a year.

I dropped my kids home from school, said goodbye to my husband, and checked myself into a local hotel for two nights.

Not for a holiday. Not even to write. But just to think. To think, and to listen, and to know.

This was a practice I started a few years ago.

It was something I realised I needed as a highly sensitive introvert who is also a mum, wife, writer, podcaster, speaker, and public figure. I needed to create a third space where I wasn’t any of those things. Where I was just me, Layla, for a few days. So I could hear what I, Layla, thought, wanted, and needed - outside of my roles, and outside of anyone else’s expectations.

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