A poem by Layla Saad
Maybe this unexplained force
which takes me to the depths
of my darkness and pain
Is the same divine force
that gives me the capacity
to hold so much power and light.
Maybe my fears and anxieties
give me empathy and wisdom.
Maybe my dark days
help me shine brighter in the night.
Maybe my emotional wounds
teach me how to love right.
Maybe I'm not broken.
Maybe I don't need to be fixed.
Image Credit: Christopher Ayme
A poem by Layla Saad
The vastness of my soul
often does not match up with
the smallness of my fears.
And so I live everyday with this
constant back-and-forth rhythm.
This reliable up-and-down beat
which has me dancing around the
perimeter of my power.
Sometimes deep inside.
Sometimes far outside.
As I expand I think:
I am beautiful! I am magnificent!
As I contract I think:
I am less than ordinary. I am delusional.
As I rise I say:
I can create whatever I put my mind to!
As I fall I say:
I am incapable of even leading myself.
As I ascend I believe:
My soul has a unique & importance purpose.
As I descend I believe:
I am unworthy of living that purpose.
And so we dance this dance,
My soul, my fears and I.
My soul ecstatically dancing
for my power
My fears mournfully dancing
for my unworthiness
And I, the observer.
Sometimes dancing with this story,
sometimes dancing with that.
Maybe this is what it is to be human.
Maybe it is about dancing this holy dance
of up and down
back and forth
inside and outside
expand and contract
rise and fall
ascend and descend.
Round and round and round.
Trying to find the beauty
of where our humanity
and our divinity
can find love
within each other.
Image Credit: Miguel Salgado
A poem by Layla Saad
Today I walked into the water
and swam far out into Mama Ocean
and asked her to cleanse me
of my fears, and purify my tears.
I prayed in the water:
O Beloved Divine
release me from these patriarchal bonds
that claim Good Girls
don't lust for life,
or desire pleasure,
or crave sensuality,
or take up space
with their wild self-expression.
Peel back these lies that insist
Good Girls must
cover up their bodies,
and restrain their hungers,
and tone down their voices,
and question their inner wisdom.
Dissolve these falsities that say
Good Girls must
hide, limit, dilute and apologise for
the power of their minds, bodies
and souls.
Mama Ocean listened calmly,
lovingly, as I prayed with desperation
to be released from my pain.
She held me as I sobbed
and choked on my fears.
She listened patiently
with the greatest compassion.
And then she sent me
the most beautiful divine sign
that my soul had been heard
and my prayers were being answered.
She then laughed softly, and whispered:
My darling daughter, you can relax now.
You can let go.
You can be free.
Mama's got you.
You can expand into your full being.
You won't explode from getting too big.
You'll just grow closer
and closer
and closer
to me.
I laughed in awe and great relief,
wiping away my holy tears.
Then I shouted back to her in delight:
Thank you Mama, thank you!
That's all I've ever wanted!
Image Credit: Christopher Campbell
A poem by Layla Saad
I was taught from a young age
to doubt my art
to hide my body
to lower my voice
to limit my power.
Is it any wonder I have feared
my self-expression all these years?
Is it any surprise I now crave it
with this wild hunger?
Image Credit: Seb
A poem by Layla Saad
What is it about
speaking our truth
that is at once both
frightening and exciting?
It is the possibility
of being seen.
Truly.
Seen.
And not just for our
shadows and the fears
that we keep so hidden
in the dark.
But for our Power, too.
For our dazzling light
and our undeniable beauty.
And for the way that we dance
this sacred dance of
Shadow and Light.
Light and Shadow.
One no less worthy
of love than the other.
Both needed
for wholeness.
This is the risk
and the opportunity
of living in truth.
The question is,
Are you ready to See yourself?
Image Credit: Eli DeFaria
