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A few months ago, Lioness stepped forward as one of my spirit guides.

To the right and left of her were She-Wolf and Mama Bear. But Lioness was the Queen.

It was at a time when my son was going back and forth to the hospital as he was having post-operative complications.

I was exhausted and wondering why God was putting us through this. I remember it so clearly: I was sat on the hospital bed while my son was fast asleep.

We were waiting for the nurse to take us to the operating theatre. I had just read a passage from the book Women Who Run With The Wolves. 

Suddenly, it felt like my brain went a bit loopy and visions started appearing in front of me, like a movie.

The first was Lioness in the savannah. Then She-Wolf in the woods. Then Mama Bear next to a river.

And then Lioness started speaking straight to me.

She talked to me about fearlessness, feminine animal instinct and sovereignty.

She taught me one of the most important lessons I've been given this year: that I no longer have to struggle or prove myself to deserve what I desire. That I have struggled my whole life and always survived through life's challenges, but now was the time to take my rightful place on my throne.

She said to me: 

"From now on, nobody - not even yourself, has the right to shame you for how you choose to live your life, or to make you feel that you are unworthy of what you desire. You are a Lioness. Royal feminine blood runs through your veins. A Lioness doesn't ask the other lions and lionesses if she can have what she wants. She simply claims it as hers. And a lioness is not afraid of the challenges that life throws at her because she knows she has the strength, instinct and fearlessness to survive and thrive."

I'm so grateful for all the things Lioness taught me this year. She awakened within me a fearlessness and a fierceness that I had never known till that moment.

Her energy is not as present around me these days. I believe she came to me when I needed her the most, and once I had assimilated her lessons, she moved on. But anytime I'm feeling scared or unsure of myself, I call on her and she floods my energy with such strength, fierceness and royalty that I feel like there's nothing I can't do.

Thank you Mama Lioness!

Layla xo

Sister-Queen,

This year the Divine Feminine knocked you off your feet, burnt you down to the ground and then took you on a crazy rollercoaster ride through the underworld.

Not for a few days or a few weeks. But for months!

She stripped you of everything that you thought you were, and what you thought you were here to do.

She told you that you could no longer move further along on your path until you dropped everything that was no longer true for you. She didn't make a polite request or sweetly suggest this. She gave you no other choice or option.

"Wake up and embody your truth NOW, or stay stuck like this FOREVER," She stated, in that matter of fact way of Hers.

What choice did you have?

You have learnt that when She comes, there's nothing to do but to surrender.

It is always for your highest good.

Beneath the chaos, can you see the unconditional love underneath every confusing, ego-destroying, soul-embodying moment of this year? Can you see that you were finally being introduced to the real you, who's been hiding under the surface all along, waiting for you to invite Her to take Her seat on Her throne?

She's here now. And She's getting stronger, fiercer and clearer with each passing day.

2016 brought you to your knees. And because of that, your real self can now step forward and take Her rightful place.

2016 kicked your butt. But only so that it could bring you back home to yourself.

Layla xo

There she is, that Sovereign Woman.

She with the courageous heart and the wild soul. She who says, "This is me. This is who I am."

She wasn't always this way.

For many years she was hidden away. Revealing herself fully only in the words of her journal and in her closest friendships. Showing up in her truth only when she felt safe enough to be vulnerable.

But now she's changed. From her appearance to her writing, she's a whole different woman.

She's the woman who was waiting inside of her all along.

It was not easy for her, this transformation. She didn't just step into this embodied self the way you would gracefully step up a staircase.

She had to go deep inside of herself to find this version of herself.

She dug and descended.
Explored and excavated.
Re-membered, re-defined and re-birthed.

And now here she stands: Battle weary. Flawed. Tender.

She's cried countless tears and faced many shadows. But it doesn't take much to see there's something different about her.

What is it? Can you feel it?

Yes that's it...

It's not so much how she looks. It's what she's emanating.

She's grounded in her Wisdom.
Firm in her Strength.
And rooted in her Truth.

She may look like she's been to hell and back, and in many ways she has, but the raging fire only devoured everything about her that was no longer true.

And what was left behind after all the layers of untruths were burned to the ground was her true essence.

She's rising out of the ashes now, this Phoenix woman. She's orienting her life to who she has become.

It's all brand new to her and she's far from having it all figured out. But little by little, she's finding out exactly what it means to be a Sovereign Woman.

Layla xo

Sister-Queen,

Repeat after me: I will not spiritually bypass the pain and discomfort that current world events have brought up for me.

I will not bypass my grief and my anger.

I will let my heart break open, open, open and allow myself to fully feel the injustice of oppression, fear and hatred that so many of my sisters and brothers have had to live with daily and for centuries.

I will not 'light-wash' this without doing the real work of self-examination, changed behaviour and having difficult conversations.

I will not stay quiet when I see the people I know normalise bigotry.

And I will be a 'light-worker' in the truest and deepest sense of the word. Not to sound cool or enlightened, but to effect actual change.

Sister-Queen, please don't take the titles of Priestess, Mystic, Goddess, Healer, Witch or Queen lightly.

You have never been afraid of doing your deep spiritual inner work.

Of going into the descent. 
Of healing your personal shadows.
Of stripping away layers and layers of yourself as you strive for your sacred truth.

But as a Priestess, Mystic, Goddess, Healer, Witch or Queen, your responsibility for change is not just to yourself or to the clients who pay you for your magic.

It's to the whole world.

So by all means use your gifts to inspire, empower and support others. After all, that's what you're here to do and we so need that medicine of yours.

But don't forget to also use your VOICE.

Using your voice is so simple yet so powerful.

Speak up and speak out. 
Call out and call in.
Write, Speak, Sing, Protest.

You're afraid of where the world is headed? Besides yourself with anger and grief about what you see happening? Heart-broken for your brothers and sisters?

Then NOW is the time more than ever to use your voice and let people know what you really stand for.

Sister-Queen, you are coming to the next phase of your soul mission now.

It's no longer about how many clients you can sign up or how many subscribers are on your newsletter list. It's about how you can do the work you're REALLY here to do.

You say you're here to help change people's lives and make the world a better place?

Prove it.

Layla xo

When I was in my 20s I tried as much as possible to avoid wearing bright or bold lipsticks.

I grew up in a time where being black or having African features was not seen as reflecting society's ideas of what beauty looked like.

Unlike today where black features are coveted and fetishized, I grew up feeling ashamed of my full lips, my round hips and my big butt. I would try as much as I could to minimise these features.

I did not see myself as beautiful. I grew up in the UK. I saw my white friends as beautiful. They were the norm. I was not. Whenever I tried on red lipsticks I felt like I was taking up too much space or drawing too much attention to myself.

Weren't my lips already big enough?

Wasn't painting them bright red like saying, 'Look at me! Look at me!' Besides, who wanted to look at me anyways?

It was only 2 years ago that I started giving myself permission to wear bold lipsticks. To have the audacity to stand out, to be seen and to actually love myself exactly the way I am. I did that in spite of what I and so many POC have been taught is beautiful. I do it to affirm to myself that I am a sovereign queen, and that nobody can make me feel ugly or unworthy without my consent.

Something as simple as a bright red lip can be a personal stand to say: I'm here. I exist. I'm willing to take up space. I'm willing to affirm my own beauty.

As I watch what is happening now in the US, and I see the racist and sexist violations that are springing up, I believe it's so important for so-called 'minorities' not to shrink down and minimise the beauty of who they really are.

Muslim women shouldn't have to feel afraid of wearing the hijab.

People of colour shouldn't have to be shamed by white racists telling them to 'go back to their country.'

Non-gender conforming people shouldn't have to fear being harassed for how they choose to live in their skin.

LGBTQ people shouldn't have to be scared of loving who they love.

What does this have to do with red lipstick?

Red lipstick (among other things) has been a simple but important way for me to reclaim my own power from the historical and still present forces of white supremacy and white privilege that say I am less beautiful and less worthy because of the colour of my skin.

Red lipstick has been both a symbol and a reminder for me to not shrink down and not act like I am less worthy, even when the very existence of white privilege says that's the case. It sounds frivolous, I know. But it helps.

To the people who are facing discrimination, abuse and hate because they don't fit into the privileged boxes of being white/male/straight/cis/able-bodied I want you to shine your inner and outer beauty as freaking bright as you can.

Take up as much space as you desire. 
Offend them with the amount self-love you have for yourself. 
Challenge them with your brand of beautiful.

Let them know you aren't going ANYWHERE and you will not be shamed by their ideas of what they deem as worthy of love and respect.

And if they don't like it, they can kiss your 💋

Layla xo